"Well, that didn't go as planned."


It’s not uncommon fur us to say, “well that didn’t go as planned.”. We’ve all said it before in one way or another. This is easy to let go of if it’s something that wasn’t too significant, but what if it’s your life that didn’t end up the way you planned? Let that sink in for a minute…Maybe you already feel that way, and if you do, how do you cope with this? Before you started feeling this way, you created a fantasy in your head and heart about what you planned for your life, and then life happens, it slaps you in the face and pulls the rug out from underneath you. You’re left standing there like a deer in head lights, frantically searching and hoping that you have a plan B stored up in the back of your mind somewhere. But you find that you don’t. So now what?

  1. Grieve it. Grieve the loss of your fantasy and the life you dreamed up. While it actually never came to fruition, it is still a loss. And a difficult one to endure at that. While this is something you weren’t actually able to hold on to and feel it in your grasp, it is what you had hoped for, wished for, and dreamed for. Allow yourself to grieve that loss. Sit with the feelings. Feel them. Allow them to have their time and space. Allow yourself to grieve. It’s okay to grieve this loss.

  2. Accept it. Accept the reality of where your life is now. Probably the most difficult thing to do. Everything inside you doesn’t want to, but there is freedom in acceptance. Once you are able to accept the reality of the fact that your plan or dream didn’t come true, your inner battle dies down. 

  3. Go out and search for the life that is waiting for you. Explore your hobbies, approach experiences and people with an open mind, apply for the job you’re not sure you’ll get, take a risk. The life that is waiting for you won’t come knocking at your door. You need to go find it.

We have to let go of the life we planned to accept the one that is waiting for us.
— Joseph Campbell